Monday, April 28, 2014

Sometimes love is not enough.

Its kind of blissful to believe that loving someone is all that we really need to be happy together.  Whether we're in the euphoric throws of NRE or in less new and more deeply connected long term relationship, we all want to believe that "I love you" is the fix for everything.  To think that nothing is out of reach when you have love.

Unfortunately the reality is that loving someone is not enough to make a relationship work.  Even that deep-down-in-your-soul-wanting-nothing-more-than-to-make-this-other-person-happy kind of love that feels like its the most important thing in the world, is not sufficient to hold a relationship together.

There is so much more to a relationship than loving someone.  Is your relationship healthy for both of you? Are you close enough together geographically to spend enough time together to feel your relationship is stable? Are there other commitments in your life that limit your options? Are you already over committed in other relationships in ways that can't really change?  Are you able to talk about and resolve issues that come up?  Are you able to consider one another in your decision making? Are you able to meet their needs and have yours met?

Sometimes, no matter how much you love someone, there is no resolution to the things that make a relationship untenable.  Sometimes you have to decide whether to continue to hurt over the things you cannot change or to let it go.  And no matter how much you want love to be enough to make it all work, sometimes it is simply not enough.

No comments:

Post a Comment